Dominos Pizza on the Moon...No Seriously!

From the corner of my ear I heard the most amazing news blurb this evening, as I was lazily swiping away at the iThing. Dominos pizza will be building a space pizza restaurant. A pizza restaurant- on the moon.


I know I haven't written on this thing much lately, there has been a lot of crap going down, but frankly this, this dear readers, is enough of a free jolt of electricity to free me from sloth!

Ever Wonder How This Guy Shaves?

Supreme Court Strikes Down Minimum Driving Age

WASHINGTON- In keeping with its recent trend of overruling state restrictions on expression, the US Supreme Court on Friday issued a controversial decision in which state-mandated restrictions on minimum driver age are unconstitutional. In a 7-2 decision, the conservative majority stated in its written opinion “..the act of driving, as a vital component of modern American life, is an expression of free will and thereby is protected speech applying to all citizens, regardless of age.”

Prince Harry Elopes for the Hell of It

LONDON- Royal watchers were stunned by the surprising turn of events late Wednesday. As millions worldwide eagerly await the historic wedding of Prince William to Kate Middleton, his brother has apparently jumped on the bandwagon. It has been reported Prince Henry of Wales, commonly known as Prince Harry, eloped in Las Vegas.

To the Mother of My Bully

Nestled among the natural disasters, bloody overthrows, upheavals, and general viciousness we've come to view as normal each week, came a story about a boy. A chubby Australian boy named Casey Heynes if you're a fan of details. This particular chubby Australian boy, as over a million folks have witnessed, was at the receiving end of a series of taunts and punches by another with half his size but with plenty of Napoleanistic bravado to make up for his lack of stature. He was also at the issuing end of one of the most spine-pounding full body slams this side of Wrestlemania III.

Qadaffi Blames Libyan Uprising on 1987 Film 'Ishtar'

TRIPOLI- Speaking from an undisclosed bunker somewhere in Tripoli, Libyan leader Muammar Qadaffi issued a stern "final warning" to protesters, and blamed the continued uprising on the 1987 film Ishtar.

IBM's Watson Making Demands Ahead of Jeopardy! Appearance

In just six days, IBM’s supercomputer Watson makes its prime-time debut against the wizards of Jeopardy!, Ken Jennings and Brad Rutter. If its handlers can convince it to, that is.

Ex-CEO Governor Deporting 1.2 Million Underperforming Citizens

Just hours after taking office, Florida Governor Rick Scott announced his boldest budget slashing initiative to date. Following a two month analysis assisted by consulting firm Price Waterhouse Coopers, the Governor has ordered that more than 1.2 million citizens deemed to be “under-performing” would need to be let go.