Relieved Morrison Emerges From Hiding Following Pardon

SACRAMENTO- In an amazing turn of events, a heavily bearded and visibly relieved Jim Morrison surprised the world following his presumably posthumous pardon on Thursday. The former rock star who had been thought dead until his sudden reappearance was recently issued a pardon by Florida Governor Charlie Crist for a charge of indecent exposure at a Miami venue 40 years prior.


Looking haggard yet fairly healthy, the former singer spoke to a group of reporters gathered at Fremont Park.

"I really couldn't stomach the idea of doing time for some bull**** stunt, especially in Florida. It's too damn hot you know" said Morrison. "The whole 'death' thing was Manzarek's idea" he said, referring to Doors' keyboardist Raymond Manzarek. "That beautiful Pollock, what a crazy scheme."
But the charade lasted a bit longer than originally planned. "I said to myself lay low for a year maybe two, the charges get dropped or erased or whatever happens when you die, but they never did. Then after a while I realized, hey the whole rock and roll god thing, I'd been there done that. It was tiring really, I was done man."
The singer related that after a year of hiding he decided he was finished with music and chose to remain 'dead', taking odd jobs and finally going back to school to finish his degree. He has since kicked alcohol and drugs and is a devoted father, though he divorced several years ago. His ex-wife knew of his former identity but kept his secret even after their separation. He currently owns a small yet successful HVAC company in Yuba City, California.
"I tried starting a band but they told me to 'quit trying to sound like Morrison'" he said, describing his experience with a short-lived Reno band The Quakers. "I hung it up after that."
"Yeah I whipped it out" he sheepishly admitted, answering a question about the incident of indecent exposure that triggered the entire ordeal. Morrison says he plans to release a book next year detailing his life on the lam, unreleased poetry, and his thoughts on modern music. "Let me ask you folks something, what is the deal with all the damn rap?"